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9-05-01 - 10:56 p.m.

So I'm listening to the as-yet-unreleased upcoming Britney Spears single, "I'm A Slave 4 U," thinking, "Wow, this would be an awesome song to strip to," and then I listen to the lyrics.

"Baby, don't you wanna...dance up on me..." Liking it so far, kinda ghetto, kinda nice. "...to another time and place." What the?!

That's all in the same line, mind you. The song has a beatbox-from-hell pounding in the background throughout the track's entire three minutes and 35 seconds. Britney's vocals are as distinct as always, crooning about... well, I actually haven't figured that out yet. But I like it. Probably because, being the obsessive freak that I am, I forced myself to listen to it for around 90 minutes nonstop so that I would. It's so completely un-Britney that I'm not sure it'll do well on the charts, and I sincerely hope the rest of the songs are better, at least lyrically.

In other Britney news, PETA is outraged by the fact that, in tomorrow's MTV Video Music Awards show, four live cheetahs will be used in the Pop Princess' performance. At one point in the routine, Britney will be dancing on a platform with the cheetahs circling below her.

This bothers me on two levels: For one thing, it's cruel. Cats�all cats�are frightened of loud noises. The Met's gonna be packed with screaming teenage girls. If you've ever been to a pop concert (think N Sync), then you'll probably be more likely to agree with my theory that human females between the ages of 12 and 17 possess vocal chords ten times more powerful than the average woman. On top of the screaming, let's not forget the extremely loud music. Add several hundred thousand watts of colored and possibly strobing lights and you've got yourself four terrified cheetahs. These cats are most likely circus animals. Don't eeeeeven get me staaarted on the foul treatment of circus animals.

The second reason this bugs me is the fact that it sounds like it's going to be a stupid show. Cheetahs?! The striptease last year was awesome. She doesn't need to try to outdo it. She can't outdo it. So leave the cheetahs at home...in Africa.

Enough of that.

I have worked two days in a row now. Yesterday I worked eight hours, today I worked six, then went and saw Janet. Rob and Bryan agree that I'm overdoing it and should continue to take it easy. Hell and no.

I talked to my biological brother again tonight. Neither of us had much to say, but I think we're slowly beginning to build a relationship. Words cannot express how hopeful I am that we can be friends.

It's still really weird to think that, biologically, this summer I became an orphan. I'm accepting it and dealing with it, but it's just bizarre.

Now I wanna bitch about my job. It's the most boring thing in the world. I try to make conversation with my co-workers, but I think they're androids because, aside from the things we've been trained to say and the smiles we've been trained to wear, nobody seems to have any personality at all. I'll say something as carefree and fun as, "Hello, how are you?" and if I'm not ignored, I'm given a strange look that seems to say, "Look, New Girl, you're not worthy of my time. I can't believe I have to split my tips with you."

All I do is clean the place. I know how to work a cash register, and I'm fairly capable of following directions, and I've been trained in the secret and mysterious art of Coffee-Making, so what's the problem? I asked Kurt, and he said most new people start out as "customer service" workers. Which is bullshit because Julianne, who was going through training the same days I was, already works at the cash register and has no previous experience.

It's pretty sad when someone can hate their job after less than a week working there.

 

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