10-28-01 - 8:10 p.m.

I have not...

I have not smoked a cigarette in four days.
But I'm lighting one right now.

I have not drunk in a few weeks.
But it's getting hard to resist again.

I have not cut in over a month.
But I showed some people my scars tonight.

I have not had sex in a week.
But Leif called tonight.

I have not cried since last Monday.
And I'm not going to tomorrow.

Last week was good. I don't know what made it good, but somehow I had a pretty high self-esteem and felt almost, dare I say it, confident.

Whatever it was, I hope it lasts through this week. And beyond.

Wednesday, of course, is Halloween. I have to dress up for work. Ugh. As if customers didn't already give me shit, now I get to be in costume! I selected mine and have been working on it off-and-on for a while. Kellie wants me to make hers, too. I said no, that she's the one who wants to be the famous fashion designer and to do it herself. I'm sure I'll end up doing it anyway.

P.S. I love this "Fall back" daylight savings thing. :)

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