04-07-02 - 9:49 a.m.

If I ever wrote a personal ad, it would go something like this:

Do you derive joy when someone else succeeds?
Do you not play dirty when engaged in competition?
Do you have a big intellectual capacity but know
That it alone does not equate wisdom?
Do you see everything as an illusion
But enjoy it even though you are not of it?
Are you both masculine and feminine?
politically aware?
And don't believe in capital punishment?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer

Do you derive joy from diving in and seeing that
Loving someone can actually feel like freedom?
Are you funny?
Ala self-deprecating?
Like adventure? and have many formed opinions?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer
I figure I can describe it since I have a choice in the matter
These are 21 things I choose to choose in a lover

I'm in no hurry I could wait forever
I'm in no rush cuz I like being solo
There are no worries and certainly no pressure in the meantime
I'll live like there's no tomorrow

Are you uninhibited in bed? more than three times a week?
Up for being experimental?
Are you athletic?
Are you thriving in a job that helps your brother?
Are you not addicted?
...curious and communicative...

�Alanis Morissette

Bryan and Justin. So in love. What gets me is just how real, how unconditional, how absolutely pure their love for each other is. It's like nothing I've ever seen outside the broad spectrum of Hollywood's imagination. Se�or Collapsed Lung is perfectly okay, although....grr...quick rant...

I have a friend. Her name is Nina. I also have another friend. Her name is Alison. Nina is in Las Vegas. Alison is in Santa Barbara. Nina is actually much closer to Bryan than to me, so I felt obligated to call and inform her of his condition. Except that she's out of town. Luckily she called Friday night to let us all, though specifically Bryan, know that she had arrived safely at Circus Circus Hotel and Casino. I told her all I knew at the time, she started crying, I told her he was fine, she kept crying.

So she called Alison to say that Bryan's lung had collapsed (true), he seizured when they tried to inflate his lung from the front of his chest (true), that he had flatlined for three seconds (true), and that he had slipped into a coma and was now considered braindead (what?!).

Alison called me yesterday in hysterics, asking what the hell had happened, if there was any chance he'd make it, and where he was. When she told me what Nina had told her, I shrieked "WHAT?!" and nearly lost my cool. Nearly. I don't care how desperate for attention of any kind Nina is. She had no right to say something for which there was absolutely NO basis in fact. I did not call Nina back. But I did tell Bryan what she had said. He laughed, saying he'd prefer the coma to the hospital food.

Damn drama queens...what the hell? I just don't get it. I told Rob about this and he cracked up.

"Nina's so fulla shit," he said.

"Well she has dark roots."

Bryan's okay. I'm okay. We're all okay. Just tired and bitter about the loss of an hour. Stupid farmers with their crops and their "make hay while the sun shines" and CRAP.

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